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she's in surgery

More updates as I get 'em

I doubt this will make sense one day

Upon bringing the Kitchen-Aid stand mixer upstairs from the basement, Sam saw it and said, "That's mine! Because I'm a boy!" This leaves me both happy and confused. I'm certain I will never know what was going on in his head.

Sorry, I can't find a current email address for you. Not surprising, plus I haven't used LJ in months. Life's been busy. I hope you'll see this, and I'll check with Karen to see if she has an current way to reach you. Failing that...

Jan Pelon, Ian Soboroff's mother, was niftar yesterday. Funeral is 1 pm today at Mt. Lebanon Cemetery: 9500 Riggs Road, Adelphi, MD 20783 (301) 434-4640; Take Beltway Exit 28B (South) onto New Hampshire Avenue. Turn left on Adelphi Road (second light). Proceed 0.4 mile to cemetery, on left.

Ian will be sitting shiva at his home 1420 Crestridge Drive through Thursday morning.

Shacharis on Sunday will be at 8AM, and Mincha/Maariv on Sunday-Wednesday will be at 7PM. Shacharis times on Monday-Thursday will be announced, along with specific shiva times.



New, from "Oh? Really!" Publishers

Yes, it's the latest in the Merciless Discipline parenting series, from the folks who brought you MERCILESS DISCIPLINE: Superglue stops the whining!, it's the Merciless Discipline dieting guide: "Duct Tape: the only dieting tool you'll ever need!"

Sold online and in your finer hardware stores.

Chillin' out

Today was the second time this week we've lost power to storms. Power came back about half an hour ago, after being off since 4pm or so. This means that I can sit in front of the fan and read LJ while the A/C chugs away at bringing the house temperature and humidity back to something I can tolerate.

I'd like to say something useful about...well, anything...except that I'm kinda brain-dead. It's been busy. Perhaps I'll post more later.
I had a new professional experience last week. I had to say to the tech standing at the C-II safe, "Please give me 4.8 grams of cocaine." And he did. All part of my job.

Welcome to summer

We took the kids to Wheaton Regional Park. It took less than 90 minutes for us to call it quits. It was too hot and we just couldn't even stay to eat lunch. We ate in the car on the way back, finished lunch at the table, & put triplets down for a nap. I changed my shirt and went out to Target to get a gift; Julian is going to a birthday party this afternoon, and we needed a Barbie for the birthday girl. I had the A/C on in the car on full blast the whole way there. While walking through the store, I saw someone from our neighborhood walking with her girls. She said, "You look hot. Are you okay?" I told her where we'd been, and took that as a recommendation to buy a Slurpee on the way home. I'm drinking that and icing my back (as per my physical therapist's directions). The situation is starting to improve.

Wherein Seth defeats the Malm once again

A while ago, I built Julian a dresser. It worked out pretty well for him, but it was taller than he was (meaning he would put stuff on top and not be able to find it) and it had more room than he needed, so it would often get filled with non-clothes random stuff.

A shorter while ago, we realized that the existing system for handling small clothes for small people (e.g. Julian's existing brothers and sisters, Tobie not yet having made her entrance) was not working. So, after some sorting and rearranging, we emptied Julian's clothes into temporary bins, and moved his dresser into the triplets' closet. His dresser held the bulk of their clothes quite well, although it was too small for everything. It's a start.

Julian's room, though, a source of much chaos and confusion, only grew more so with a handful of bins cluttering up the place. I made it to Ikea on Sunday to pick up another Malm dresser (one level shorter than his old one, to avoid the problems mentioned in the first paragraph) and succeeded in throwing my back out again.

Tonight, I was feeling well enough after three solid days of steroids & recuperation to assemble his dresser. I managed it in under two hours, with an assist from Karen on one of the fiddly bits. When Julian awakes in the morning, he will find most of his bins gone and his dresser filled with his clothes.

Some days, it's good to be the dad.

Why Karen's posting is better than mine


Could I have written this? No. I couldn't have even come close.

Sandra Boynton's Dinos to Go

With apologies to George Carlin, who did something similar for the Seven Dwarfs.

Zoomer: Totally ADHD. Recommend stimulants (e.g. amphetamines) to bring her back to level.
Dozy: narcoleptic as the day is long. Recommend Provigil to add a bit of consciousness.
Hey-Ho-Howdy: bipolar, heavy on the manic. We'll fling a little lithium his way & see what happens.
Sob: major depression. Prozac or your SSRI of choice.
Snort: No actual problems, but a real dick. We'll slip some Haldol in the next ice cream he steals & see if he mellows out.
Tremble: anxiety disorder. We'll start with BuSpar & see how things go.
Smooch: Smooch is way too level. She also doesn't seem to have a job. I'm thinking she bought Pfizer stock 65 million years ago and is living off the dividends.

This, folks, is what happens when I read children's books too often. I also wonder if the truck driver in the Berenstein Bears book "Inside Outside Upside Down" could get charged with cubnapping. But I digress.
So, I mowed the lawn today. Shocking, no? Please remember that the lawnmower storage area is blocked by the sukkah. I took that down today, too.

Only took 6 months to get around to it...

Not just "Baby Girl" any more

We have a name! Introducing Tova Lieba! (Tova = "good" in Hebrew; Lieba is "loved one" in Yiddish). We'll call her Tobie. Hello, Tobie. It's so nice to meet you!

Need updated icon - we had a girl!

Beautiful Baby Girl delivered this morning - 10:11am. She was about a month early, but GINORMOUS compared to the newborns we're used to - weighing in at 5lbs, 9ounces. Pictures to follow as soon as Karen gets them online.

(if you follow Facebook, no new news - just covering an additional community)

How strange

Julian stepped on the scale this morning. To show him the difference between his weight and mine, I did the same. Turns out I'm just about back down to three Jonathans. Note that these are Imperial Jonathans - I did not gain weight to go up to Metric Jonathans. I hadn't realized I'd lost more weight.

How strange.
Ganked from jeliza:

Lollyphile is currently featuring Caffeinated Maple Bacon flavored lollipops.

You *know* you want some. Although Lori probably wants to wait until the puking and diarrhea has ended. Sorry, hon. I, personally, will have to enjoy them vicariously; unlike the maniacs over at Bacon Salt, Lollyphile is not a kosher-bacon-flavor-producing company.

Child raising? Don't plant 'em too deep

I suspect by the time my kids are old enough to understand what Alcoholics Anonymous is, there will be an organization for kids to sit at meetings and bitch about their parents. It'll be something like "Raised by Geeks Anonymous". Sam will be there, probably as a result of tonight.

As I was putting him in Mickey Mouse pajamas, I sang to him:
"MIC...that stands for Minimum Inhibitory Concentration, one of the ways antibiotics are tested to see at what point they retard bacterial growth!"
"KEY...the way that drug moieties fit into a receptor site is often called 'lock and key'!"
"MOUSE...genetically altered 'knockout' mice are common in drug research for how they can confirm or refute a hypothesis regarding a disease state!"

I apparently saw the wrong Mickey Mouse Club House as a kid. Or as a pharmacy student. Sam took it well. I think he understood one word in ten.

She calls 'em like she sees 'em

For several months, the triplets have been at a stage where they want to be read to. This is much better than the previous (but sadly still ongoing) stage, "shredding books to make confetti to redecorate the house with". We have the remains of a once-decent collection of Boynton books, among others. One of those is one that is available both in Spanish and English, Opposites.

Unsurprisingly, by now, I have it memorized. In both English and Spanish. I'll give you a taste:

"Big, and small. Short, and tall. High, and low. Fast, and slow. Heavy, and light. Day, and night." There's different animals illustrating the opposites. Rhino and bird. Pig and giraffe. Sheep and sheep. Dog and snail. Elephant and rabbit. Bear and bear. If you click the link to the Spanish book above, you can see one of the inside pages if you click on the photo of the book.

Ellie has reached a point where she can fill in some of the book. And, clearly, she understands some of the subject matter. So, I would say, "Big, and small. Short, and..." Ellie: "Tall!" Me: "High, and..." Ellie: "Low!" Me: "Fast, and..." Ellie: "Slow!" Me: (pointing to the elephant): "Heavy, and..." Ellie, pointing at the elephant: "Abba!" (hebrew for dad) Me, cringing, finishing the page and turning it over to the next illustration, a hippo). Ellie, not letting me talk, and pointing at the hippo: "Abba!!!"

Okay, I get the point. I'm 6'2" and ~275 lbs, and she's somewhat smaller and lighter...being, you know, a toddler. Is this fair? And how did she learn to get me a consult for gastric bypass?

survived last night

I'm not in too much pain, despite two hours of shoveling. If I'd had to do it all myself, it would undoubtedly be too painful today.

During a couple of the attempts to determine if I could get the car out of the gap in the snow at the end of the driveway (the hardest shoveling was done by osewalrus, who got a gap dug where the snowplows had piled it higher & deeper) was that the snow was still compactable. You know, by a forced collision with a Honda Accord. If only I had a plow blade for my car...

update: still 38

Still could be better, although I'm glad it wasn't worse. Made it through last night & today, with the help of friends & family. Sheri dropped off food prior to Shabbos. The Nelkins dropped off a full meal, which of course lasted for two meals considering the quantity of food delivered and the number of mouths here. Karen's mom both dropped off & picked up Julian from school (he was there for, well, like 3 hours!) but it was his special day, so hopefully it was good for him. She also relieved Mariam (our nanny) so that she could prepare for Snowpocalypse '10. I fed the kids dinner for three hours on Friday night, and tried putting the triplets to bed. At 9pm, I gave up on them going to sleep, and left their room to go to bed myself. Julian had already put himself to bed. They didn't kill each other, so it's a win for everyone.

Today went fine - they didn't wake me up until almost 8am, so I got lots of sleep. Breakfast went well, kids played together nicely, and osewalrus and his medium Bear dropped by after shul to check in on us. Julian & Bear played together for an hour or so, and I got the triplets out in the snow. The first time it snowed like this (Dec. 19th) I took them out and they were miserable. Today, they loved it. They went out again later. Julian went out into the snow a total of five times. He's in hog heaven.

I gave them lunch, and at 1 pm put them down for a nap - they were kvetchy and tired. Fortunately or unfortunately, only the girls napped - Sam wouldn't go down, so I took him out at 1:30pm so that he wouldn't wake his sisters up. I had trouble staying awake, but Sam didn't demand interaction, so I read a bit and managed to keep my eyes open while he played. The girls got up at 3:15pm, so they napped approximately 2 (two!) hours. I got them a snack, we went out into the snow for the second time, and went inside for dinner. It seemed after dinner that they were losing it again, so I took them to bed at 7:30. I took Ellie back out to save her being abused, and although Abby & Sam threw their regular fit, Sam dropped off to sleep by the time I took Ellie back in.

osewalrus and Bear had come at my request to assist in shoveling my driveway in case I found childcare coverage so I could work tomorrow. Karen's still in the hospital, yes, and there's no knowing when she'll be out. When I came in for hand warmers for Bear, I heard playing in their room, but when I just checked on them, everyone was unharmed and in their beds. While shoveling occurred, Julian put himself to bed - in my bed. I could move him, but I just moved 30 cubic meters of snow (with help), so why? It's not like there's more beds down here.

Once everyone is up and fed tomorrow, I'll call Karen's mom and let her know that she doesn't need to panic about getting to us to relieve me for work - it sounds like they haven't cleaned her complex yet. I'll call the local grapevine & see if coverage can be arranged, and if not, c'est la vie. What else can I do?

38 can suck it

As if this wasn't bad enough, the triplets decided that tonight was a night they didn't need to sleep. I can't put Julian to sleep until they're out. The sounds of them screaming and beating each other up tends to disrupt his bedtime routine.

I have another batch of dishes to do, and laundry to put in the dryer. Then off to bed. I blew the money my father-in-law sent me for my birthday on getting our handyman to snake our bathroom sink. It's a stupid way to spend the money, but I like being able to wash my hands. I'm weird that way.

I owe everyone on Facebook a thanks for the birthday wishes. That may happen someday. Yee-ha.


Where, oh where, was Mr. Sandman last night? I only wanted him to gently apply his hammer of sleepiness across my skull sutures...

Darn it, I have several moods to apply. Why can't I say that I'm sleepy but up but drowsy but tired? Yeesh.

Good morning, y'all!

Parenting thoughts

Last evening, Sam gleefully stepped across a small gap between the ottoman and the chair. He looked back at me and laughed, and it clearly meant "Look at me and what I can do!" I thought to myself, "That's one small step for Sam, but one giant leap for Samkind."

As I was lying in bed last night, five minutes after putting all three triplets back on their mattresses, I heard one of them fall off their mattress onto the hardwood floor. This happens all the time, FYI. I thought to myself several things in quick succession: "It's raining kids", "Aah, the pitter-patter of small children raining on the floor", and at least one other not very funny thought that I now can't recall.

This is why the person who most often posts about the kids is Karen. *grin*

Ow, ow, dammit, ow

Pain. Take meds for pain. More pain. Take more meds for pain. Rebound headache? Take meds for pain, discover they don't do anything, go to bed. Sleep, then discover that the pain is strong enough to wake me up.

Sigh. Get up, take more meds for pain, read LJ. Not enough posts, so write own post (without sufficient articles) to bitch about pain. Ow. Dammit.

Not a Gratuitous Icon Post

...but a gratuitous Journal subtitle post. New subtitle brought to you by how much I have to do, and what this brand-spankin' new cold has done for my head.