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I'm likely, during the period of time of 5:30pm and 7:30pm, to be trying to get the baby to sleep. I have called my telephone company (they're a full service, family company: La Cosa Nostra Telecommunications) to get a new telephone feature added.

The service? No, not Caller ID. We already have that. No, not Call Block. No, this is a much more active feature: Call Insurance. Any telephone calls received during this two hour period will be traced, and a car full of Mafia thugs will be sent to the caller's house to gently reason with the people who made the call. Tonight's callers got off light: only their fingers and their jaws were broken. This prevents both dialed calls and voice calls. Repeated callers receive the special "Dirtnap" service. Do I need to be more clear?


Nov. 12th, 2004 05:02 am (UTC)
If I asked him that, he'd tell me to use my nose, or take inspiration from My Left Foot, assuming that those don't get busted just for spite. But then again, he might decide to have my arms and legs broken just because I think some of his puns are too much of a reach.

He's got a maniacal grin. You can never really tell with those types. :)