Fourteen x-rays later, it seems that I did not break either leg or either ankle. I did sprain my left knee (the one I had surgery on a few years ago) and my right ankle. Hooray! I am big boned!
It's going to take up to 6 weeks to heal, and I have to follow up with an orthopedist. More importantly, I need to now go buy a house without stairs. Stairs suck.
*EDIT* I attempted to descend a large piece of equipment where I am not small enough to slide down the slide. So, I tried to go down the ladder...but ended up putting my foot through where a bar should have been and ended up upside down, hanging by my calves and ankle.